"Do right, but not right now"

I was listening to Pandora today and I heard a song that I have heard countless times before but for some reason it just stuck with me today. This is the end of the chorus:

She says "I wanna do right , but not right now"

Oh, I want do right but not right now

How sad is this? And how common is this? I can't tell you how many people I know who say this same thing. Some without realizing it, and others it is a very conscious decision to live the way they want to while they are young. They plan on growing up and becoming a responsible adult with awesome relationships. What they are not realizing is that they are postponing what would ultimately satisfy them. 

Any of you that really know me know that I am crazy about analogies. Most of my analogies have something to do with gymnastics, but I am proud to say that I have an analogy for this scenario that has absolutely nothing to do with gymnastics! It would be like winning the lottery, but instead of spending the money, you say to yourself, "I think I will just wait until I get a little older, then I can settle down and really enjoy the money." How crazy is that? Who would do that? I know I personally have an entire plan for what I would do if I ever won the lottery (not that I have ever even bought a ticket).  

Why not live the life you want now? Why not be who you want to be now? Don't waist time! 

It is well with my soul

At this point in my life I have grown to appreciate many things that I formally took for granted... today was one of the days that I was able to appreciate a lot of things. I woke up, after going to bed around midnight (this was an early night for me!) to find the sun shining in on and house quiet. I smell coffee and discover that my little one have made me coffee. Natalie is washing the dishes and says, "I came into your room and saw you asleep so I decided to surprise you." The rest of the day was for the most part great. We were able to finish school, wash laundry, make a trip to the post office, go grocery shopping and have time to paint some shells on the back porch. Days like this it is easy to be grateful.

The problem comes on the days that are not like this one. When you wake up to kids fighting, a messy house and you just know that there is no way that you are going to get all the things done that you need to. It's a lot easier to be appreciative when life is easy. My mom would always tell us that it is easy to obey when she would tell us to go get some ice-cream, but harder when she would tell us to go clean our rooms. This is sort of how a joyful attitude is, we can be content when we are getting what we want, but the moment things are not easy we revert back to our 5 year old self saying, "I want... and I want it now!"But that is not what joy is. Joy is an ever-present position, it is unchanging based on circumstances.

Whenever I think of joy, I instantly think of Horatio G. Spafford. He is the author of one of my favorite hymns "It is well with my soul". This song is so uplifting... but the story behind it is not. It started when his only son died from scarlet fever, then the Chicago fire destroyed all his investments, then his wife and 4 daughters left for Europe a few days before him on a streamliner, the boat sank and only his wife survived. The song was written after all this happened. The song was written in dispair and yet he was saying it is well with my soul. How I long for that kind of joy!

1. 
   
   When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
   When sorrows like sea billows roll;
   Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
   It is well, it is well, with my soul.
   • 
     
     It is well, with my soul,
     It is well, it is well, with my soul.
2. 
   

Home

So about 14 months ago these great people burst into our life! It didn't take long for strong bonds to be formed. It worked out perfectly... a fellow photographer/crafter/baker/homeschooler on my side not to mention the fact that both husbands were named Justin and they had 3 awesome kids that played great with our 2. We were able to have deep conversations followed by terrible puns (thanks to the Justins). There were countless hours spent watching ridiculous tv shows and drinking great cups of coffee (with Almond Joy creamer whenever possible). We had one of those rare relationships that was just easy.
The problem is that no matter how much you want someone to feel like your home is also theirs, you cannot force it. Unfortunately, this is what happened. I so wanted our kids to grow up being best friends and get to watch their boys play music with N and N. But you can't force something like this... you can't make someone love your home.
Kindred spirits are hard to come by. I have only had a few in my life and from very early on in our friendship it was clear to see that Bekah and I were kindred spirits. If people had been a fly on the wall in some of our conversations they would have thought we were crazy!
So we got the news that they were moving back to the great state of Texas. Hearts were broken, tears were cried (my face was splotchy for a day or so). My soul was sad, but at the same time, my soul was at rest.
So to sum things up friends were made, but friends were NOT lost.  And even though some things are just super lame, it's only because we are short sighted and can't see the big picture. People may say things like, "well, they just wasted a year of their life". This is not true, they are different people then when they moved here, they have affected so many lives here. It was NOT a wasted year! They got called here, and then they got called back... end of story. We are just blessed that they were here even if for a short time.

Just a few to show the crazy relationship our family has with one another

A rare moment where it is not Nathan and Matthew together

There is not much to say!

Boys loving each other

Crawdad catching

David dancing to the strobe light fireworks

If you were a bug

I cannot count how many time I have heard betend or beingtend (for some reason Nathan and Natalie are convinced that this is pretend). They have such an active imagination that it becomes a hassle for us when we are trying to get things done. We hear Nathan yell, "be careful when you back up, you are going to hit the house with the trailer hooked to the back of the truck." They are constantly making up stories of things that have happened to them. Sometimes it's cute and sometimes it makes me want to pull my hair out.
Today was a cute day, as I was cleaning the floors Nathan informs me that if I turned into a bug he would make sure that Justin didn't step on me! I could hardly keep myself together. The best part is that he was so relaxed when he told me, and so confident in the fact that he would protect me. When it is not cute is when it's 10:30 in the evening and he is so scared because the bear from Brave is real.
Where do we draw the line between real and pretend? Do we ever fully learn to do this? I have so many irrational fears, I have just learned to keep them in side instead of screaming. We all have so many delusions. We ignore so many major problems in our life and our society. We are 'beingtending' that things aren't real just to make things easier for us.
Walking in truth is one of the hardest things to do. but if we can learn to cast our troubles on someone who cares, things would be a whole lot easier for us. It's something that 7 year olds and 70 year olds need to learn how to do.

Outside looking in

This weekend we had the wedding of the year (my sister's of course)! I must say that it was one of the most beautiful weddings I have ever been to. I laughed, cried, and had a great time.

From the outside everything went off without a hitch, but what you don't see looking from the outside is the tears when the wedding had to be moved in doors, the panic when we couldn't find flower girl baskets, the stress when the cake started to lean, and all the nerves that were involved in the whole weekend. Everything came together, and boy are we glad that it did, but I think it shows us an important lesson.

One reason we shouldn't judge a book by its cover is because we don't see all the problems when we look at the outside. I am always telling Natalie and Nathan not to compare themselves to others. If you compare yourselves to others you are comparing yourself to a an idea and not what is really going on within.

Justin and I have such a great relationship (thankfully!!) but don't judge us from the outside. We cry, we get offended and we get mad. It's not perfect but it IS great. You can't chase perfection because it is not attainable (not even any longer in my beloved sport of gymnastics). But why worry so much about never being able to get perfection when you can reach greatness?

Tick Tock

I cannot count the number of times that I heard my mom say "take time, have time". If we didn't clean, read a book, have quiet time, exercise, or anything else we wanted to do, Mom's response was always "take time, have time". When I was young this statement drove me crazy, but as I am getting older it is becoming my response as well. There is so much truth in this one statement. Whatever you take the time to do is what you are prioritizing. Sometimes it's intentional and sometimes it is just poor planning, and sometimes it is the choice to place the wrong thing in priority. Prioritizing is tough. The days it seems like prioritizing (or 'taking time') is really difficult, are those days that I am NOT super busy. On those days I usually end up laying around for way too long. I realize I have waisted my day when its almost time to leave and I haven't done anything around the house and I am still in my pajamas. 

Today is not going to be one of those days, today is going to be one of the days where I take the time do what needs to be done. 

A little bit more than amity

Amity is defined as a peaceful relationship, and Justin and I have been blessed with a peaceful relationship. But a successful marriage is about more than a peaceful one. Sometimes you have to call one another out on things, sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do. But if you make sure that you place your relationship above any other earthly relationship there are a lot of things that you never have to deal with.
This week was our anniversary... 4 years! I can honestly say that I am happier now than I was when we first got married (not that I wasn't happy then). Don't get me wrong, marriage is hard and is something that you really must commit to inorder to be happy/successful. But it is also one of the best things you will ever do and can be wonderful. Thankfully I have a wonderful husband who has completely committed to the marriage and prioritizes it over lots of things. 
For our anniversary we had a schnazzy dinner at the Tavern followed by a nights stay at the Alpine Motel, for any of you that are familiar with Abingdon you know that the Alpine Motel is nothing special, but for some reason I have always wanted to stay there, So thankfully, the Hus came through. We slept in til 10!!!  And then spent the day roaming through Bristol and Johnson City. It was nothing special but it felt like a vacation. It was so great to be together, just us (except for a lunch date with TR).   

On our way home we had to stop to get a pic of the an awesome rainbow.